How many ways of seeing do you think there are? Yes, we look with our eyes, but do we always look with more than that? Do we put what we are seeing in context? To time? To place? To self? To others?
Do we also see with our hearts? Our senses? Can you feel what you see? Can you hold it in ways that have nothing to do with seeing?
Do we see with our hands? Can you see with your mind?
I think the answer to all those things is yes, we see in all those ways....
But, I think the thing of more import is what we do not see- or at least what some in this thing called adoption fail to see, or refuse to see.
So if I were to ask all of you who read here, what do you think some fail to see in this mess called infant adoption, what would you answer? Tell me what you all think, and let's see what comes of that, what one thing will prompt me to write a NEW THING- Something that will make every godsdamned fool sit up and take notice~
That is my challenge to all of you-give me a prompt worth writing about-
For now I am going to sit here and dream awake- and think of what might have been...
3 comments:
Mary, seeing requires thought. People, society as a whole are taught to ignore things that are not "happy".
It is something you see in "friends" - or fair weather friends. You only see them when it is a "good" time.
We teach positive outlook. Look at the bright side. You know that the cup can be half full.
When the truth is, life is not rosy. A real friend is the one that cries with you. A real friend is the one that says "snap out of it" and still is there when you can't unfunk.
The bright side always has a dark side. And that damn glass really is half empty.
The idea that we are unable to see the beauty of things and still cry about the pain is ludicrous, rediculous,outrageous, foolish and down right stupid!
My daughter has her point of view - after all she is her, not me. I have my point of view. Somehow, there is a happy medium. I am hoping that she gets it as much as I do - and thinking she is probably two steps ahead of me.
Sigh....talking to the wind.
Not talking to the wind- and yes the glass is half empty- I truly think we all need to learn how to truly see everyting-
Mary,
I think we see with our history. My history includes the loss of my firstborn son to adoption, therefore how I "see" some things is colored with that loss. My history also includes being raised in a very angry, un-loving family which also effects how I "see" things. Everything from our history effects us ~ all in different ways.
I think the history of adoption is what we, as a nation, have failed to see. There is a history of studies that show the truth of adoption: Babies & their mothers are already bonded at birth. Babies are not blank slates. Biology does matter. A persons genetic history does matter. A mother's love for her child does not go away. A mother that gives a child up for adoption is still a mother.
We (our country) need to look at the lessons to be learned from our history. We need to make changes so future generations do not know the pain of unknown history ~ parents, ancesters, medical history, etc. Expectant moms need to be informed of ALL aspects of adoption loss before being allowed to make a choice for adoption. They need to hear the history of life as a natural mom from some of us that have been there.
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